Thursday, May 26, 2011

Theres A Hole In My Heart

since i left you
i keep thinking whether i do the right decision or not?
since i left you
i keep thinking back the past till now
since you left
i keep thinking why i left you
since i left you
i keep thinking that i will hurt you
that's why i keep on say i lost your contact...

i don't want to contact you for so long i got my reason
i don't want you to think back that how i left you
i don't want you to think back how i hurt you
i don't want you to think back how i treat you

but till the end
i still can't let it go
alot thing is my 1st time that happen to you
my 1st feeling of love

i just hoping there was nobody gonna hurt more than i do
but until now
you tell me something
that guy hurt you
i keep thinking that who hurt you worst??
me or him?

you make me sad and angry
do you know that??
my heart so uncomfortable
do you know that??
you keep saying there is no 2nd chance for me
i keep on thinking
i'm so sorry i hurt you the most

but till now
i don't wanna see you get hurt
but you're just heart,just get hurt again
my decision that i made to left you is wrong

if there is a 2nd chance to me
i swear to GOD and my life
if i left you,hurt you
i will kill by accident
no matter what accident

i still remember what you wish for boyfriend look like..
MOST IMPORTANT IS NO SMOKING.DRINK STILL OK LA.NOT TOO MUCH
MUST BE CARING.MUST BE LOYAL.WON'T LIE.WILL ALWAYS SEND A
GOODNIGHT TEXT.MUST ALWAYS GIVE YOU A SPACE.MUST ACCEPT WHO YOU ARE.WILL REALIZE EVERY DETAILS OF YOU.WON'T AFRAID TO INTRODUCE HIS FRIEND.WON'T LET YOU WAIT A LONG TIME FOR A REPLY.IF BUSY WILL LET YOU KNOW.CAN STAND YOUR TEMPER.MUST KNOW HOW TO COMFORT YOU WHEN YOU'RE SAD..AND THE LAST THING HE MUST LOVE YOU....

i still remember what you tell me
i cant forget
i still remember when i not eating in the right time and get scold by you
but the next morning at 6.30am you text me and wrote
REMEMBER to eat !
Busy also must eat !
A slice of bread better than nothing!

i was so happy that somebody is caring about me
when i see the symbol "!"
i keep thinking that is a warning to me^^

when i wanna listen your voice
is very hard
recently i just heard your voice once
but every text message you send to me
i keep in my memories

recently i feel weird why you keep on asking the same question
but from now i know why
i can tell you i don't mind
don't think bout it

when you tell me everything
you make y tear drop
do you know that
my friend was shock and ask me what happen
and i say dust just get in to my eyes

i know is haunted you
i wanna let you know
what had happened is happened
you teach me

i remember what you told me
when text message there is NO
-haiz
-swt
-=.=l|
-zzz

do you know recently i didn't use this symbol?
is my bad habit
i change
not what you think i was liked the past

i just hoping there was a 2nd chance for me
i guess no
that why i write down here and express all me feeling thru here
the beautiful memories are like hand cuff
make me can't forget what had happened at the past



Sorry That I Love You
Break Up Hug
(Anthony Neely)

Sunday, August 1, 2010

Scare , Don't Dare , Feel Suffering

Like somebody is easy...
Talking with somebody is easy...
Playing with somebody is easy...
Telling your feeling with somebody is easy...

But not every feeling you could tell somebody...
What kind of the feeling?
I feel suffering everyday...
But after talk to somebody my feeling better....

I keep think..
What happen next if we together??
I still thinking what will happen next??
Lost everything??

When somebody feel sad...
I wanna help...
But after help...
I will have bad happening...

I don't know whether you know or not...
But I will keep shutting my mouth till the end....
I want my answer to come out...is very hard...
Why?



SECRET
One Republic

Monday, May 24, 2010

Immune

i can sense everybody soul around me...
but there is 2 person i can sense the soul...
i can predict the future when the person is close to me...
but i can't SENSE or PREDICT you...
i ask my mom why??

my mom say the person is IMMUNE your power...
when i was 16 i can predict and see alot thing...
i receive this power from my mom...
my mom can see the future...
but i can predict the future...

i hate to eye contact with everybody...
if i eye to eye to a person~
and it IMMUNE...means there is the 1...
i always tell my lover...u have IMMUNE my power...
but there is a person appear in front of me...
the person i only know bout a month ago...

do you believe faith??
i do...
something when it happen until u don believe...
i don know whether i'm couple now or not??
when i ask my lover when is our anniversary...
she don know...
already 2 yrs...

i wan her to concentrate her study...
i wan our future to be good...
i told her before 1 thing...
don ever think guy will find money more than girl...
don ever think guy will give money to you...
don ever think guy will give u happiness forever...

and her answer is..
I KNOW~
SWT~!!

why i would like her...
in her age...her thinking is totally different from other people...
she told me 1 things...
money can't buy happiness...
is truth...
and she told me...
whether we are rich or poor...
we are happy is enough...

when i quit working at 1 company...
she told me...
if not happy,try other company...
don let people look down on you...

this is the way she support me...
i made her as my target of my life...
and i promise her...
i will earn and save the money and make the best memory until u can't forget in your life when u get married...

alot of my friend tell me...
don think future...
in this age love can't last longer....
she tell me to find other girl...
but i told her...
my heart got you and there is no other people can replace you...

when my bro birthday...
my mom keep saying~
she is my future son wife...
and she non-stop laughing...
maybe too happy when my mom say...

when i give her see my hand...
she crying...
and she ask me to stop working...
cuz i hurt to much...
i tell her...
i get is valuable...
only just for you...
the moment she crying...
i can feeling her heart pain...
the 1st time i can sense her...

i only can u tell u..

I LOVE YOU~


Teardrops on My Guitar
Taylor Swift

Sunday, July 12, 2009

Feel Of Love

i told myself before i will wait the truth feeling of love...
but...
at last i found in in front me...
i wait this kind of feeling very long time ago...
but...
i still don know whether you're SINGLE or IN RELATIONSHIP...
but...
i still don know u much...
but...
i keep continue this feel till the moment i give up...
but...
i won't tell u until i can't keep this feeling anymore...
but...
i will make u know that who am i...
but...
i wanna u to know who am i...
but...
i hope u will regret...

before u regret i will let u know how am feel bout u...
before u make a choice i hope tat u won't regret...
before u make a choice i hope u don mind wat my status is...
before u make a choice i hope u will treat and don betray me...
before u make a choice i hope your parent know who am i...

why my feel of love at last appear on me???
i still don understand??
ur smile?
ur eye?
ur face?
or ur body??

actually my answer i will tell u later how u attract me...
i juz don get it...
ur not a really beauty to me...
but other people think tat ur a beauty...
to me i don think tat..
feel is feel...

i won't force u together with me until u know my status...
but i will tell u my status...
the most funny this tat is my kai ma...
she say tat my eyes is a scanner...
1 shot hit all point of ur status...
but 2nd time i see u..
u have make my scanner spoil for 2 days...
LOL~

but tat day is my last view of u..
i have eyes contact with u so long..
u attract me more and more...
but i won't so rush to get u...
maybe my fren think tat i writing tat person they know..
i only tell to my best fren know...

i can't sleep well..
my brain keep thinking of you??
why???
i will wait u till the end....



SUPERHUMAN
Chris Brown ft. Keri Hilson

Monday, June 22, 2009

Monthly and Daily...

i done many good thing and bad thing around this month...
i feel tat something is happening between my friend and cousin...
i got got thing to tell to my cousin actually is wat happening around me and him...
i starting to get stress till end of the august...

am i in love??
am i be in love by somebody else??
am i a playboy???
the answer is in front of ur eyes...

happening early of the month..
i was thinking whether my choice of choosing u is correct or wrong...
my brain keep on confusing me...
but i will delay ur answer longer and longer...
not i wanna do this to you...
i just wanna understand u more and let u have time to understand me more and more...
love doesn't mean got feel and couple...
the answer is NO...
do you think couple is easy??
NO~
but i feel something tat very strange bout u and me...
i think we're from different world..
my cousin let me see something and make shock...
i starting to ask myself...
i just saw u 1 time only...
wat make u feel tat u like me??
the answer is in ur heart...
LOVE???
do you know wat is love??

i think u still wondering whether am i single or couple??
the answer only my lover know...
but in my heart a lover just 1...
not 2....
but the 1 maybe thinking tat i'm playboy...
but do you know my heart only got you...
maybe i say out these word my friend will think tat i'm playboy...
i don mind..
do they know wat am i thinking??

i like mature...
i like good thinking...
i like cute...
i like smile...
i like polite...
i like natural...

but i don like u act...
whether u act i can see thru u..
but i will take longer time to understand u...
i will make u happier and happier...
but i will fight and quarell with u...
quarell and fight me can understand each other more and more...
but when i tell u something...
u will tell out all ur fren...

do you know these kind of react is wat kind of character??
those housewives having nothing to do at home and talk about people kepo thing...
i hate those kind of people...
but...
if u wanna tell then u go ahead...
someday u will get paid and said sorry to the person...

maybe somebody will think tat i like triangle love..
ur answer wrong...
maybe my cousin and friend will think tat somebody tat they know...
their answer NO either...
the answer only i know...
but i will tell tat person... wat happening....
i wan him/her to understand the situation...
the answer only my mom and my kai ma know...
i wondering if there any people talking about my thing behind me...
if YES...
step in front me and tell me...
but i think they don dare...
they dare to talk but don dare to act...
BULLSHIT~!!
i don mind wat u talking..
wanna know the truth answer...
ask me...
i will tell u every answer...

maybe tat person like me also the same kind of people..
who care...
just be who u really are..
NATURAL~

but i will be single for along time...
cause the real thing haven't appear in front of me...
take ur time to think wat am i thinking...
understand me more...

my competition is near by...
i don wan because of YOU make me can't concentrate...

wat inspire me to write blog...
because of 1 song...

KNOCK YOU DOWN
by
Keri Hilson ft. Kanye West , Ne-Yo....

thanks for this song...

Thursday, March 26, 2009

Love and Hate

Love and Hate:

sunshine full fill the sky,
that the moment how we met,
make a war in the cabin,
that the way how we talk,
beautiful moon full fill with star,
that the way we drink together,

morning sunshine wake up from the bef,
that the way i like your chubby face,
make a memories you can't forget,
that the way we look each other,
next morning don't know how,
that the way i don't know how to talk,
full fill confidence and make it right,
that the way i will hold your hands,

back to home and wait your mail,
that the way we keep in touch,
make a confidence to say out my word,
that the way i gonna tell you,
make a confidence to say LOVE YOU,
that the way i said I LOVE YOU,

wait next day keep the feeling,
that the way how i feel,
you make myself full dissapointment,
that the way you wanna become friend,
full fill with weirdness that how i feel,
that the way how i know,
keep secret from each other,
that the way everyone knows,

people know secret and spread the word,
that the way you hate me for life,
i write a poem with my tears,
that the way i want people feel,
don't blame yourselve for everything you do,
that the way its make it hurt,

just tell me what do you want,
that the way i will help,
forget the hate and forget the past,
that the way will you happy.


true love is not everybody can get...
remember...
couple must tell the truth to each other...
ur lover tell u secret...
MUST KEEP IT...
don let people know...
if not u will get blame...

while i writing this poem...
i listening a song name...
AKON - SORRY,BLAME IT ON ME...

i get blame again...

Wednesday, March 25, 2009

The Moment In Love and Break My Heart

1st day i saw u and i'm in love with you...
but we not know each other very well...
i have some kind of special feeling while i looking at you...
you not my dream girl...
but i got tat feeling...
i keep asking wat happen to me??

why am i so easy in love??
why
why why..
why why why...

2nd day i saw u with the wake up face...
i feel tat i wanna pinch your face...
with ur chubby face...
when i bring u go out from the and shooping...
i wanna hold ur hand..
but i don dare...
while u shopping with her...
beside me tell me alot thing bout u..
i know u can't let ur ex go...
i'm feeling tat i gonna give up on u...
but i not so easy to give up..

3rd day u with me in the car...
while i fetching ur fren to bus station...
i feel tat we're the same..
but i keep telling myself we're not the same...
after send ur fren to the bus...
i wanna hold ur hand and go back to the car...
while in the car...
u tell me alot bout ur secret...
since u tell me alot secret...
and i telling u back my secret...
while i fetching u go to ur ex house and take back ur ic...
i was waiting inside the car and ask myself...
why i'm not going down with u...
at the night..
we drink chivas together..
and ur drunk face is so cute...
when at the dance floor...
u say u wanna see me dance...
i dance for u...
but the moment i dance...
i keep call u to dance...
and u dance...

izit tat is ur 1st dance??
when reach home...
we watch movie together...
at the same room...
incredible...(don simply think)

4th day the morning...
not i don wan talk to u...
just i don know how to talk to u...
i keep asking myself while i eating..
why why why??
how could this happen??

i like ur singing while ur at the bus stop...
ur voice very nice..
while walking to the bus...
i plan to not gonna hold ur hand...
but i can't control myself to hand ur hand..
after hold hand...
i'm in love...

5th day i know u...
the night i chat u in the phone...
u keep ask me how now??
and u keep say YOU DON KNOW..
but...
i prepare to tell u tat i'm in love with u...
but u say OK...

6th day tat i know u...
u tell..
I WAS THINKING WHOLE NIGHT...
HOW BOUT BECOME FREN 1ST...
i'm ok bout it...
then i keep listen to say title name...
KISS ME THRU THE PHONE...
the song is keep making thinking bout u...

the 7th day i know u..
i found out something...
my heart so pain..
u told not to tell the secret...
but u making somebody to know the secret...
my hurt so pain...

i tell my fren...
while i writing this blog...


here is my little poem to you..

Ever since I met you,
I've had these feelings deep inside,
mainly when you hold me,
and look into my eyes,
you make me feel so young again,
and give me feelings I'd forgot,
you make me feel so happy,
with cupids arrow I've been shot.